Winning*

*Mike & Molly might just be the funniest show that no one is watching. And by "no one" I mean me.

*I had a sleepover with my 2 year old niece two weekends ago and will have my one this weekend with my 2 year old granddaughter. I'm calling it GNI = Girls Night In.

The cutest niece. Ever.

*In my absence I've been cooking up a storm. Recipes coming soon. You have been warned.

*Gas prices are pissing me off. Ugh.

*I don't really give a hoot about the royal wedding. Or The Bachelor. But I will be watching Dancing with the Stars because Wendy Williams is part of the new cast. How YOU doin'?

*Crest 3D White Vivid just might be the best toothpaste. Ever.

*Insurance companies suck. I don't want to take a generic version of my meds. Thankyouverymuch.

*The soldier threw live grenades last week. And loved it.

*Despite my title Charlie Sheen is so not winning. Although I think the warlock in his brain may be.

*The big three-five will be here tomorrow...

WW: A Hairy Situation

No hair

New hair

Neon hair

Where do I go from here?

For this journey I won't need any luggage, a laptop messenger bag, or a passport.

When I started this blog the teen was in high school and like many of you, my life revolved around my kids activities. Our social life was completely intertwined with whatever he was participating in as indicated by my blog posts. I wouldn't change any part of that but it now leaves me at a crossroads.

The teen became the soldier this month. He is several states away starting a new life and our life, my life, no longer revolves around him.* That leaves me with more free time in real life and less blog fodder for this world.

I don't want to abandon my blog (I'm sure it seems I have some weeks) but I just don't feel like the name, Not Your Average Soccer Mom, describes me or my life that well. I'm still a Mom but not a full time one anymore. As he grows I feel like I should, and my blog along with it. I've thought about playing around with the Army Mom thing but to be honest I don't want my identity to revolve around "Mom" anymore.

So I'm looking for some inspiration. Some ideas. Some...something to put me in the right direction.


*Life may not revolve around him but we do anxiously await his phone calls. It's hard to be so far away & not talk to him every day.

Have a Craptastic Day!

Yesterday I woke with high hopes even tweeting "Happy hump day!". I was cheerful as I kissed S goodbye and as I sang along with the radio. Positive thoughts equal positive results right?!

Bullshit.

Upon setting foot in the office my day went to crap. It was a steady flow of problems from start to finish. After one fire was put out another exploded and landed in my lap. Eventually everything was resolved (sorta) but my positive thoughts & good mood had already gone away.

Reflecting back I now realize I set myself up for failure. Thinking it would be a GREAT day. That meant anything less than GREAT would be a sad disappointment. Twisting around in my head I've come up with a solution using reverse psychology.

This new thinking will solve my dilemma. My expectations will be so low even the slightest good thing will be an improvement. An "okay" day will turn into an exceptional day.

"Have a CRAPTASTIC day!" I say to one & all!

Dyson and gone to heaven

There are few appliances that wow me. (Which in itself could be weird - that appliances wow me at all and/or that I'm so darn picky I only like such a small selection.) You may remember my love post written to Keurig last year. That little machine has revolutionised coffee in our household & I'm still every bit in love today as I was when I wrote that post 13 months ago.

Then there is my KitchenAid mixer. While I haven't professed my love in writing before now, I can assure you that it holds a special place in my heart, stomach and kitchen. Cakes, cookies, bread, pie oh my! This mixer has never failed me.

Onto my latest appliance crush - my brand new shiny yellow and gray Dyson DC14. Man this thing really SUCKS! (No really. It's a vacuum so it's supposed to.) Like most people I was hesitant to believe the hype. Especially when factored with the price, but a frugalista like me waited for just the right sale before making my move.













It was worth every one of those 29,900 pennies.

I was amazed (and slightly repulsed) by all the dust it picked up. Considering we vacuum once a week and I vacuumed with our old (crap ass) machine before using my Dyson one would think it wouldn't have much work to do. But that machine worked it's brush rotating magic on my floors like no other.

I promptly added it to my "cannot live" without list. What's on yours?

**These products mentioned in my post were bought by me. No one has paid me to pimp any of them out but machines of this magnitude deserve to be recognized. Of course if any one of these companies would like to send me some free stuff for my obvious loyalty, I wouldn't turn it down. Hint, hint...

Have you ever wondered...?

...how Ke$sha got a recording contract? Her lyrics are awful and the auto tone is apparent.

...why people slow down once they see a police officer or state trooper on the interstate? If you can see them it's too late dumb-dumb.

...if Elvis/Tupac/Michael Jackson are really dead? They sure make good tunes in their afterlife.

...what Tony Parker was thinking when he cheated on Eva Longoria? Dude, she's hot.

...if they will just ban fat people from McDonald's? It's all downhill after the Happy Meal toy law.

...why anyone would get a tattoo on their face? Two words: Mike Tyson.

...how The Event has not been cancelled yet? That show blows.

...when Lindsay Lohan's dad will shut the eff up? No worries he'll hold a press conference to let you know.

...what you're having for Thanksgiving dinner? Oh wait, that's just me...I want to know your plans. :)

Cell Transportation

Sometimes I get funny looks when I pull out my...cell.

You see I've tried just about everything to transport my communication gizmo and nothing really appeals to me. Cases are too big & bulky. Keeping it in my purse is not an option. Fuggedaboutit. I'd never find it again.

I have resorted to carrying in my bra.

As long as I don't have on a t-shirt then it's easily accessible to me. I always know where it is and I can feel it vibrate.* While I can understand some of the weird looks it brings I haven't found a viable alternative yet.

Maybe ya'll could save me an awkward situation or two - where or how do you carry your phone?

Hey at least I'm not doing this:



*The vibrating has nothing to do with it's placement (pervs!)...I simply don't like loud annoying ringtones.

Have You Seen This Girl?

Sometimes I joke about being crazy. Everyone must seem that way at one time or another right?! But the last two days has proved I'm as cracked as Humpty Dumpty.

Cracked. Crazy. Cuckoo. Insane. Mad. Touched.

Emotionally I've been a complete mess. A blubbering, teary mess. Over nothing. In the last 48 hours tears have sprung forward about all kinds of trivial shit. Things that normally wouldn't get a second thought have turned me all kinds of melancholy.

I'm not that girl. I'm NOT.

Or at least I wasn't. ~sigh~

How do I find ME again? That's the question...

Autumn's Patchwork Quilt

As the leaves begin to change, I can see the beauty of the season from my kitchen bar stools.

And it's beautiful.

Tales of a Homebody

It wasn't always this way. In fact this time last year I would have been swamped with football games, Saturday competitions and lots of good old fashioned fundraising. But now the teen has become an adult (scary huh?) and there are no more high school activities.

Combine that with a football crazy husband who insists on playing and/or watching that horrid sport all weekend and that leaves me without much to do. Or should I say without much that I'd like to do.*

I'm not the type to go to the movies solo and most of my friends have young children so we don't get together much. Plus we started using a budget in August so I don't have a ton of extra money to blow anyway.**

As you can see I have been forced into a "homebody" status the last few months leaving me couch-side watching lots of tv and cruising the internet for beach bags. Relief might be on the horizon though...

Our dart tournament started last night and while we play on Thursday nights, maybe it's just the kick in the butt I need to get off the couch and start living again. Truthfully I wasn't looking forward to it but after we got there, put some coins in the jukebox and started playing it was exhilarating.***

We lost (by one game) but it didn't matter because we were having a good time. Together. With friends. As it was meant to be.

*There is always something to clean but who wants to do that on the weekends? Not me.

**Budgets suck.

***Exhilarating except for the cloud of cigarette smoke. {cough, cough, gag}

Twitter-sations

The following tweets earlier this week:





Resulted in this question:



And this response:



Some things just aren't as they seem and Twitter is FULL of TMI.

Happy Friday ya'll!

Proud moments

While I've been away THIS happened





It was a proud moment for S & I and all of our family to see him walk across the stage. Yep the teen finally graduated and we all sighed of relief that high school was finished over a big stack of IHOP pancakes.

What? We like IHOP. Not to mention it was freakin' 8PM on a Wednesday night and IHOP was right around the corner.

After our celebratory dinner/breakfast it was time to get ready for the graduation cruise. We planned, packed and dreamt of nights on the sea not at all worried about what was to come.

College plans & arrangements were made and only the money part wasn't nailed down. His school of choice had some staffing issues in the financial aid department that caused his paperwork to be sent to us late. "Don't worry" they said.

So we didn't. Then vacation was over and a bill was waiting in the mailbox.

No problem! We had already talked about student loans and narrowed our very small amount of choices* down to one lender - Sallie Mae. Little did I know what I was in for.

First of all, the criteria set by these institutions is just crazy. They really expect a high school senior to make $12,000+ a year? No, they don't but it's their way of forcing the parents to be responsible for the loans.

Not an issue, I thought. Signed my name on the dotted line and told them to proceed. A few days later we got the "good" news - we were approved! Yay! At an astronomically HIGH interest rate.

Uh, excuse me Sallie Mae maybe you didn't hear but I have an 883. In fact Trans Union pats me on the back and says I'm in the top 20% of the nation with that score. Turns out SM could give a darn about any of that.

With this interest rate his loan would be DOUBLED by the time it was paid off, and that's with making a monthly interest payment. Some "they" somewhere makes that decision and there is nothing more that they can do. I can accept it. Or not.

You know what I did when they said that? Bad ass that I am...I cried.

Then I called S & cried some more. It wasn't that we were told no, but it was pretty close because there is no way in hell that I'm going to hinder him (or us) with a loan like that. By the time he graduated he would owe over $100,000.

My God!

S sat him down and explained it all to him. I will tell you as proud as I was when he graduated, it was at that moment that I was most proud of the teen. He took the news in stride, much better than I expected. Then with a very grown, mature attitude he made the decision not to accept that college on those terms and began to talk of Plan B.

I'm not sure where Plan B will take him yet. He's weighing all his options now so there will be an update to come on that but this weekend he stepped into adulthood. And he's walking tall.

My suggestion for any parent hoping to send their little ones to college one day - College Fund. A big, huge college fund. Or maybe start playing the lottery because the costs are only going up.

*Thanks to the new health care plan.

The Gift of an Ordinary Day

A friend sent me this video a couple days ago. Within the email she wrote a few kind words about the teen & how much we will be missed next year.

The closer graduation gets, the more I will realize how much WE will miss them. After 4 years of being involved in the boosters it will seem odd not to be a part of those planning sessions. Not to be a part of the behind-the-scenes crew that makes all of our fundraisers so successful. Not to be with the band when they celebrate their wins & mourn their losses.

It's making me a bit teary eyed and since no one one likes to cry alone, grab a tissue & watch this video.

“Somewhere over the rainbow..."

"...skies are blue, and the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true”

Table Topics Tuesday: So many, so little time

what bad habit of yours would you most like to break?

Oh, where to start?

My procrastination? The fact that I take on too much? That I cannot stick to a healthy diet?

Now that I'm seeing in writing it seems they are all related. Because I'm so busy all the time I like to rest when I can rest.

Thank God for Sundays!

And so I procrastinate and things that need to get done don't. Not until the last minute. Then I rush, rush, rush to get it done, often times forgetting stuff.

Like the candle I forgot to turn off when I left Sunday.

Being busy is also my excuse for a poor diet. When we have a function then it gives me an excuse to pick up fast food. When I'm relaxing I can justify that big bowl of ice cream by saying I've already "done so much". When I have time to exercise, I don't have the energy.

I admit they are all excuses because believe it or not there are people on the planet that make time for that sorta stuff. Crazy huh?

Maybe in the next 34 years I can get my act together. Maybe...

Now it's your turn:
what bad habit of yours would you most like to break?

The bug is back

I haven't been here since my last post. Over 10 days ago.

Wow.

I don't know that I've ever stayed away so long. Even on vacation. And trust me this hiatus has not been a vacation.

There was a computer crash. crash, bam, boom, BROKE...

...senioritis from the teen...

...financial aid craziness...

...concerts...

...grandkids...etc, etc, etc.

In other words - life.

I feel the urge coming back though.

The blogging bug.

The Perfect Cure

This weekend we had a celebration for a combination of things - birthdays, Mother's Day, a new birth - and all the kids were in attendance.

I'm still trying to climb out of my blah-ness. Trying to get back to normal. Well as normal as I can get anyway. I can't say I've ever been quite right.

Nothing brings a smile to my face more than seeing their happiness.





See what I mean? It's almost impossible to be in a bad mood with them around. You can't help but smile.

Sometimes I wish I could bottle it up and save it for a gloomy day.

A little of him...


A touch of her...


And a ton of this smile...


Throw in a mushy moment...


Serve with a side of cake.



It would be the perfect cure for the blahs.

Blah.

That word sums it all up.

Blah.

I don't feel like doing anything so I've been avoiding everything. Blogs, Twitter, Facebook, reading, cleaning, cooking, couponing. Every. Thing.

Blah.

I will think of something I want to do or say and then immediately feel like it's just too much effort.

Blah.

Where ever the blah came from I wish it would go back because the next six weeks will be crazy busy and I'm not ready. For any of it.

Blah.

Just wondering...

*How much of Heidi is real and how much is plastic? Definitely a 20/80 split...and I'll let you decide which is 80%.



*Why it is so hard for people to use their turn signals? It doesn't hurt. I promise.

*Who thought "untrimmed chest" would make good lyrics in Trains "Hey Soul Sister"? Unless the song is about Chewbacca. But I don't think it is...



*Why the city is working on a major landscaping project...when budget woes are forcing them to close schools and raise the meal tax? Besides the fact that they could not afford to maintain parks & other public areas last year, bushes should be the LAST thing they spend money on.

*Signs in the same city say "DUI Illegal - City Wide". Are there cities that allow it some areas but not others? I think I'll skip a visit to those towns.

*Why are the teen & his gf holding a gnome during Prom pictures?**







**Because the photographer made them. And when I say "photographer" I mean ME.

Lucky #13

All of these are symbols of luck.



But I don't need luck when I have you...


Happy Anniversary S!




LUCKY #13!